If anything I’ve come to accept certain things in life
happen for a reason, perhaps leave you frustrated, a little disgruntled or even defeated at worst. Let’s just say “Brave-Jungle-Jane over here is not immune to those feelings, I can tell you that much. While I’m never one to stare defeat in the eye and call it quits at first, second or even third challenge, this past year however did the things to me!!!! A lot had taken place over the past month (granted it was year-end and both body and soul were just not having it anymore) and I needed to let out, call it screaming, crying, exhale, hey look whatever blows your hair back to get my drift - I needed to do that and so we took a drive down to the Berg.
Let me just say I’ve had the same tent for two years now and I mean I’ve mastered pitching the damn thing enough to know I can pitch it with my eyes closed. That’s kinda like what happens when you enjoy the outdoors or atleast for most people I know. I've scratched my old picture files to find you a picture of my tent. I think we were in Champagne Castle a couple of years back here and yes I pitched. But listen to this...Its first weekend of Jan 2020, i'm an emotional wreck and so we decide on that long overdue bush date with Nthabi. A wreck no doubt because down the N3 metro cops doing their due diligence, gave me a ticket for forgetting my driving license in my other bag at home, brilliant Lee, just brilliant. (happy to take donations to clear this one peeps)
First day was absolutely amazing. I mean to run fields like Julie Andrews, re-living her memories from "The sounds of Music"haha An absolute dream. Cant fault that !!!
From that half day hike which we started well after midday, we drove another, uhm say an hour thirty to our next destination, still Drakensberg, yes its that massive! Needless to say we arrive late at the campsite (story of my life, you know the drill by now surely?!).
We finally arrive at Mahai campsite. Its dark as ever and we drive through. My eyesight is super sharp, alert at any given time so I quickly spot him. He's seated over there on a camp chair reading a book using his headlamp. We park, rock out out tents and ready to pitch. All the while Mr "i'm reading a book, concentrating and minding my own business" keeps staring at us. Not that kind of stare man, the kind to say "do they even know what they are doing". He slowly starts making his way over, my heart is rolling its eyes, yes my heart. He was cute, a bit scruffy beard but tiny beard, not the one to make me go bonkers... lol i lie!
Anyway, he walks up to us and offers to help pitch our tents... she agrees for him to help but I look at him on some “thanks buddy, I got this”! And no I (clap) did (clap) not (clap) give (clap) attitude!!!! 45 min into it, I’m still bloody pitching when all I actually just wanted was to lay it in such a way that I’ll see the sun rise, surely that was not much to ask the universe was it??? I mean I pitch all the time, whats up Lee, come on girl.
Dude at this point?! Yup you guess it, he’s long gone!
Long story short, I pinned whichever parts I could and let other parts hang abnormally and parked my car in such a way that when he wakes up in the morning he won’t see the mess that took place. It was either that or swallow whatever nonsense pride I had and go ask for help…But no, not me! Braved the windy night (thanks thee most amazing sleeping bag) coz I felt none of it.
Fast forward to early hours. Can I just say that at 5:10 in the morning I was gracefully greeted but thee most gorgeous gorgeous orange red skies my heart had been yearning for months! I cried ! I’m suuuuch a weeper it’s sickening blah-blah-blah!!! I cried and all I could say was Thank you Lord for the rising of the sun !!! Sure I was annoyed the previous night, but for about an hour I watched as the sun rose, I was in constant worship, in silence, ever thankful to see such magic.
Sure I get you, you're probably judging me thinking I could’ve just accepted help from an oh soooo cute nature'-loving neighbour who was kind enough to offer help. I could’ve, but I didn’t because of this die-hard, mean-ass-girl attitude that serves no one! I’m working on it I promise. But I have to say I learnt a couple of things again in those moments. So here goes:
Note to self:
1. Accept kind gesture of help and Share the load:
When I have too much going on in my head and someone offers help, seriously Lee it’s okay to say “Yes please and thank you! – did I mention he was soooo cute?!
It honestly takes away nothing from you hun, relax and save your energy for other bigger battles to come! It’s only a tent, gee come on! Next time it may be something much bigger. Share the load, No weakness in that?!!!!!!
2. Its okay not to have it together
Amidst the struggles and battles of life or darkness, you do get disorientated and things that are usually a breeze suddenly turn against you like “what?! I failed to pitch a one man tent I’ve had for over two years ?! Seriously?! 😂😂 but well the sun rises finally the next day and hell!!!! It is beautiful, all you needed was a little rest... so if things don’t workout now, be patient with yourself Lee and be kind to you, wait (or sleep in this case)
3. Peace be still -Silence the frustrating voices in the head
Watch how it all works out in the end for them that love Him! Something tells me Had I just said “Peace be still” and breathed in and out, I could’ve been able to pitch effortlessly, but there was a lesson to be learnt and that night, and so class was in session, smack bam in the middle of Mahai Campsite.
4. Lastly it is true what they say “Joy finally came in the morning” and oh what a beautiful morning, oh what a beautiful day.
We had such an amazing weekend. A few shots below... I come back recharged and ready to face the year ahead with Nthabi...
I keep meeting me out there, its insanely awesome.
I hope to hear some of the lessons you get to learn about yourself out there...
Drakensberg Mountains, South Africa